Tuesday, October 5, 2010
Monday, August 2, 2010
We Think We're Ready
Or, we're pretty sure we will be when it actually happens.
Our paperwork is all in place now for a second adoption. We had to renew our homestudy (a much less tedious and less expensive process than starting a homestudy from scratch), and make a new photo profile to show what life is like now that we have Isaac. So, technically, we could get a call any day saying a birthmother has seen our profile and wants to meet us.
I still have to write a little blurb to go on our agency's website about us, so we aren't yet visible to birthparents that are just browsing the site, but I will get that done soon, I hope. We're not really in a hurry--for one thing it would be nice to have Isaac walking before we bring home a newborn.
But, we felt it was time to get started again. We really want Isaac to have a sibling, and figured the sooner the better, in some ways. I'm not sure if having a child already will make us more or less attractive to birthmothers. We'll see.
We're raising money to help pay for this adoption through a company called Just Love Coffee. It's a great ministry, so if you haven't already checked it out, click on the link to see our store page. A percentage of any purchase through our Just Love webpage will come to us to help with adoption expenses. We've already received our first check!
www.justlovecoffee.com/TheErdmanns
Our paperwork is all in place now for a second adoption. We had to renew our homestudy (a much less tedious and less expensive process than starting a homestudy from scratch), and make a new photo profile to show what life is like now that we have Isaac. So, technically, we could get a call any day saying a birthmother has seen our profile and wants to meet us.
I still have to write a little blurb to go on our agency's website about us, so we aren't yet visible to birthparents that are just browsing the site, but I will get that done soon, I hope. We're not really in a hurry--for one thing it would be nice to have Isaac walking before we bring home a newborn.
But, we felt it was time to get started again. We really want Isaac to have a sibling, and figured the sooner the better, in some ways. I'm not sure if having a child already will make us more or less attractive to birthmothers. We'll see.
We're raising money to help pay for this adoption through a company called Just Love Coffee. It's a great ministry, so if you haven't already checked it out, click on the link to see our store page. A percentage of any purchase through our Just Love webpage will come to us to help with adoption expenses. We've already received our first check!
www.justlovecoffee.com/TheErdmanns
Saturday, July 31, 2010
Test Results
The doctor called yesterday and let us know that the MRI and the X-ray both came back normal. No indication of what is causing Isaac's delays. This is good news. But the doctor is still concerned with Isaac's development, and wants to order more blood work and possibly other tests.
We have an appointment with him on Aug. 10. We'll just keep doing what we're doing, and hope that either we find out what's wrong, or it becomes clear that it doesn't really matter.
We have an appointment with him on Aug. 10. We'll just keep doing what we're doing, and hope that either we find out what's wrong, or it becomes clear that it doesn't really matter.
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Development Issues
Those of you who know us beyond this blog (which I'm guessing is most of you), have most likely heard something about Isaac's development issues. At about 6 months I started noticing that he was lagging behind in some things--eating solid foods, grasping toys--just little things. I brought up my concerns with his pediatrician at his 9 month check-up, but the doctor wasn't concerned. By the 12 month check-up, though, the number of questions to which I replied "no" (does he pull up on furniture? finger feed himself? crawl or scoot? roll over? say Mama or Dada?) concerned him enough to suggest we have Isaac evaluated by Help Me Grow, a state program that provides intervention for young children with development issues. "Concerned" is probably too strong a word, but we did go ahead with the evaluation.
According to the test, Isaac was significantly behind in his motor skills, adaptive behaviors and communication. His scores for cognitive and personal-social development were normal. So, we've had Isaac in physical, occupational and speech therapy, and we've been seeing some doctors to find out what the reason for these delays might be.
Isaac is a very happy, very social and very curious little boy, and he is very healthy. We're not terribly worried that there is anything seriously wrong, but one or two of the doctors we have seen have been concerned about his delays. There seem to be no physical indications of what could be wrong, and that is what has them stymied--usually this much of a delay has some clues that can be found in a simple physical exam. We had an MRI and an X-ray this morning, to determine if there might be neurological or orthopedic reasons for the delays. The therapies have been helping, and Isaac is crawling around and pulling up on furniture like a pro, and is showing improvement in communication. We're grateful for those things.
I have to say, though, that this whole thing has been really stressful for me, mostly for two reasons. One of those is navigating the medical and insurance system. I've spent hours on the phone with doctors and insurance customer service people, trying to figure out what will be covered, why certain things aren't being covered even though our policy seems to say they should be, having prescriptions written with the right codes on them, etc. I can't imagine how stressful this would be if I was dealing with a life-threatening condition, and if I didn't have the time, being a stay-at-home mom, to make all these calls.
The second stress is dealing with the reactions of people when they find out we are concerned with Isaac's development. Many people have implied (albeit subtly) that we are overreacting. We get lots of responses like this: "Really? He seems fine to me. He's so happy and looks so healthy. All kids develop at their own pace, you know, you can't compare them to other kids. There's no need to rush them. They grow up soon enough." I've had someone say that God made Isaac, and made him perfectly, so there couldn't be anything wrong with him. So, why are you getting these tests? Of course, I also get shocked looks from strangers when they find out he is 18 months old and not walking.
Grrr. Isaac is healthy and happy, and I love him exactly as he is. But, several doctors have expressed concern that he is behind in his gross motor and communication development. We thought and prayed about it and decided to go ahead with the MRI (which will end up costing us a lot of money out of pocket). The procedure went smoothly, but now I'm not sure what to hope for an outcome. If the tests come back and show nothing wrong, then we "wasted" all that money, and we still don't have answers. But I don't want there to be something wrong, either.
It seems cliche to say God is in control, but I know that's true. He can provide the money we need for the test (which we do have in savings, but were hoping to use it for other things). He can grow Isaac up into the boy and man He wants him to be. He can help the doctors find a reason for the delays and help us decide what needs to be done. Or, He can keep it all a mystery, and walk with us as we do what we can and help Isaac learn and grow. And, He can help me respond with grace when people make me feel insecure and question our decision to pursue this course. He is good, all the time. We'll keep watching and waiting as we trust in Him.
According to the test, Isaac was significantly behind in his motor skills, adaptive behaviors and communication. His scores for cognitive and personal-social development were normal. So, we've had Isaac in physical, occupational and speech therapy, and we've been seeing some doctors to find out what the reason for these delays might be.
Isaac is a very happy, very social and very curious little boy, and he is very healthy. We're not terribly worried that there is anything seriously wrong, but one or two of the doctors we have seen have been concerned about his delays. There seem to be no physical indications of what could be wrong, and that is what has them stymied--usually this much of a delay has some clues that can be found in a simple physical exam. We had an MRI and an X-ray this morning, to determine if there might be neurological or orthopedic reasons for the delays. The therapies have been helping, and Isaac is crawling around and pulling up on furniture like a pro, and is showing improvement in communication. We're grateful for those things.
I have to say, though, that this whole thing has been really stressful for me, mostly for two reasons. One of those is navigating the medical and insurance system. I've spent hours on the phone with doctors and insurance customer service people, trying to figure out what will be covered, why certain things aren't being covered even though our policy seems to say they should be, having prescriptions written with the right codes on them, etc. I can't imagine how stressful this would be if I was dealing with a life-threatening condition, and if I didn't have the time, being a stay-at-home mom, to make all these calls.
The second stress is dealing with the reactions of people when they find out we are concerned with Isaac's development. Many people have implied (albeit subtly) that we are overreacting. We get lots of responses like this: "Really? He seems fine to me. He's so happy and looks so healthy. All kids develop at their own pace, you know, you can't compare them to other kids. There's no need to rush them. They grow up soon enough." I've had someone say that God made Isaac, and made him perfectly, so there couldn't be anything wrong with him. So, why are you getting these tests? Of course, I also get shocked looks from strangers when they find out he is 18 months old and not walking.
Grrr. Isaac is healthy and happy, and I love him exactly as he is. But, several doctors have expressed concern that he is behind in his gross motor and communication development. We thought and prayed about it and decided to go ahead with the MRI (which will end up costing us a lot of money out of pocket). The procedure went smoothly, but now I'm not sure what to hope for an outcome. If the tests come back and show nothing wrong, then we "wasted" all that money, and we still don't have answers. But I don't want there to be something wrong, either.
It seems cliche to say God is in control, but I know that's true. He can provide the money we need for the test (which we do have in savings, but were hoping to use it for other things). He can grow Isaac up into the boy and man He wants him to be. He can help the doctors find a reason for the delays and help us decide what needs to be done. Or, He can keep it all a mystery, and walk with us as we do what we can and help Isaac learn and grow. And, He can help me respond with grace when people make me feel insecure and question our decision to pursue this course. He is good, all the time. We'll keep watching and waiting as we trust in Him.
Monday, February 8, 2010
Birthday Boy
Dear Isaac,
We can't believe you're one year old today! We remember the first day we met you like it was yesterday. The surprise phone call, the trip to the hospital, and the first glimpses of you. You've grown so much since that night--you're about 10 inches longer now, and weigh more than three times as much!
You have brought us such joy in this last year. Your daddy and I remember the first time we heard you laugh--it was the most amazing thing I'd ever heard. We've had such fun snuggling with you, reading to you, playing with you. You've been such an easy-going, peaceful, happy baby. And, oh my goodness, those cheeks! They are irresistible.
We are so excited about this next year. We get to watch you grow taller, learn to crawl and walk, speak your first words. You always look so intently at the people and things around you, we just can't wait till you can share with us what you're thinking. We're looking forward to watching you start to go from a baby to a little boy.
You are a gift to us, and you are very well-loved.
Mommy
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